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Category: Kids Kill You Slowly

When Kids Threaten Your Sanity with Band Instruments

May 19, 2018 blamemama

Ayeeee! This school year, the 9-year-old finagled a trumpet rental out of his dad to play in the elementary school…

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Posted in: Kids Kill You Slowly, School Daze Filed under: elementary, fails, farts, noisy kids, not gonna do it, parenting humor

Of Kids and Their Love of Farting and Fart Noises

blamemama

I initially brought you all here to complain about farting kids and how much they love to try to get…

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Posted in: Bodies Are Weird, Convos With Kids, Kids Kill You Slowly Filed under: elementary, farts, fun products, funny kids, gross, middle school, parenting humor, preschool, teen

Kid Leash? Because kids are full of monkey business, amiright?

blamemama

I recently saw this adorable monkey mom video online and had to share! Read below to find out what I…

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Posted in: Care & Feeding, Kids Kill You Slowly, Parenting Advice Filed under: disciplining kids, fails, parenting advice, parenting in public, road trips, safety, toddler

Indestructible backpack? Challenge accepted.

May 9, 2018 blamemama

Parent: I’ll buy my child this expensive, practically indestructible backpack with reinforced straps and zippers that will.not.break. I’ll get it…

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Posted in: Kids Kill You Slowly, School Daze Filed under: elementary, gross, middle school, parenting humor

Jello NOT for the win.

May 2, 2018 blamemama

Should I worry about this? He’s not even five yet and wants no less than a Heisman trophy for eating…

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Posted in: Convos With Kids, Kids Kill You Slowly Filed under: funny kids, parenting humor, preschool, sibling rivalry

Toddlers Do Not Understand Time Zones

April 28, 2018 blamemama

In the epic war of toddlers versus time zones, battles are always lost because toddlers do NOT understand time zones.…

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Posted in: Convos With Kids, Kids Kill You Slowly Filed under: parenting humor, toddler

“My name is naked!” By Broccoli the Toddler

April 27, 2018 blamemama

Go to Amazon and buy one of these cool toddler t-shirts to celebrate your kid’s amazing vibe. Asking a male,…

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Posted in: Bodies Are Weird, Convos With Kids, Kids Kill You Slowly Filed under: funny kids, parenting humor, penis, toddler

Anyone That Knows Boogers, Knows Funny.

blamemama

As a mom of four, I’ve got a lot of booger experiences to share. Check it out: If your day…

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Posted in: Bodies Are Weird, Kids Kill You Slowly Filed under: funny kids, parenting humor, toddler

Things I Never Thought I’d Say: An Open Letter To My Kids

April 18, 2018 blamemama

An Open Letter To My Kids When I asked my teen to pick up his dirty sock, I didn’t realize…

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Posted in: Convos With Kids, Kids Kill You Slowly Filed under: elementary, funny kids, middle school, momster, parenting humor, teen, toddler
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